Like this:

Well, it’s been a year since I last visited my blog.  What a year it has been, so in no particular order except as I think of them:

First, because of struggles with my mental health I have decided to wind down my Social Enterprise, Think Make Grow Ltd.  It will be finished by  Dec 12 or Jan 13.

Second, I didn’t want to close the Open Up creative group for people experiencing mental ill health so we have made it an organisation in its own right and are just about to start a project funded by “See Me” creating an anthology book with the aim of challenging stigma and sterotypes of people with mental illnesses.

Third, my wonderful daughter auditioned to be in a professional pantomime and got a part.  She is in the middle of the run now and is completely loving it.

Fourth, 16 months ago I was referred for DBT therapy and told the wait would be about one year or a little over.  Six months into the list I was 7th in line. Eleven months into the list I was 4th.  Thirteen months in I was 2nd and fouteen months in I was 4th again.  In just under 12 months the list has moved just 3 places and I am 4th – it seems like I’ll be waiting another year at least.

Fifth, Dave went for and was offered a new job which was completely the right thing for us and the organisation.  Then it was snatched away from us at the last minute by a minority in a members vote – we don’t know who they are or why they did it even now.  This was difficult for us and the organisation is now floundering on its feet.

Seventh, my health has been so dodgy that the amount of work I can do has been significantly reduced – this is weird and hard to get my head round as I have always worked and paid my way.

Eighth, our landlord needs to sell our home to release the capital.  We are not thinking about it just now, except to say at some point we will have no choice but to move again.

It has been a good year!  We have gained a grandson, been on a two week holiday (the first time in ten years), cleared 100% of our debt, in other words we are completely debt free, we’ve met up with friends old and new, and gone a whole year without what I would describe as a serious crisis.

Of course, all this looking back stuff is pretty pointless.  The question is, what will next year hold for us as a family?  What do I need to do to make it a better year than last year even if things go wrong.  This year I was counting on the DBT I’m waiting for to enable me to make the best of life and the job we knew dave was right for to imrove our circumstances, with essential input from God.  This year I know better – I might not get to start DBT in 2012, Dave may never get a job within his calling – but, God does not change, his input is the essential ingredient to a year that is good regardless of events and circumstances.  Of course, one has to define “good” in order to understand this.  Good is not having everything go my own way or everything going smoothly or even the easiest route to an end or imunity to tragedy.  It isn’t being happy and never arguing with family and friends.  It is living my life, and enabling others to live theirs without judgement, with all integrity and moving towards God who I love whether I can see him or not.

Advertisement